The 32 Decider Skills
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Stopp
Stop! - Take a breath - Observe - Pull back - Practice and/or Proceed
It Will Pass
Thoughts and feelings come and go. Situations change. Sometimes all we can do is keep going. It will pass.
Distract
What can I do right now to help me focus on something else, instead of my distress?
Do One Thing
Choose something to do. Do it mindfully. How long for? 20 minutes !
Turn The Mind
Choose to take the new resourceful and helpful way. Use a skill ! If you always do what you always did, you'll always get what you always got.
Right Now
Right Now: 5 things I can see - 4 things I can hear - 3 things I can touch - 2 things I can smell - 1 slow deep breath
Soothe
what can I use to soothe myself? Soothe my senses. What is in my sooth bag/box/app that will help me to feel better?
Values
What are my values? What is really important to me? What can I do that will help me take a step towards my chosen life direction?
Breathe
Focus attention on the breath. Imagine a balloon inflating on the in-breath, and deflating on the out-breath.
Observe
Take the helicopter view! Pull back. What's the bigger picture?
This Moment
Focus on the here and now, in this moment. Say to yourself: "I am sitting" or "I am walking". "I am looking" or "I am listening". "I am breathing". Notice the sensations of that activity in this moment.
Focus
Where is my focus of attention? What am I thinking about? Where do I want to focus?
Drift
Am I drifting? Is my attention wandering? Bring attention back to my chosen focus.
Fact or Opinion
Ask yourself: Is this thought fact or opinion? Come back to the FACTS !
Wise Mind
Taking reasonable mind and emotion mind into consideration.... What would Wise Mind make of this?
Keep Calm And Carry On
Focus on your chosen slogan or positive self talk statement to help you cope during distressing times.
Self Care
Sleep - Eating & Exercise - Look at other factors - Find fun, achievement and enjoyment - every day. Be kind to yourself !
Thinking
Don't believe everything you think ! Thoughts are just thoughts.
Name The Emotion
What emotion am I feeling right now? I can notice the urge to react, and choose a more helpful response.
Opposite Action
Notice the emotional action urge - and do the opposite. If anxious, instead of escape/avoid - approach. If angry, instead of attack - kind approach or gently withdraw. If depressed, instead of withdraw/isolate - do something, be with others.
Sieve Or Sponge
What thoughts am I sponging? What am I sieving? What can I start to notice instead?
Build Positive Experiences
What can I do to add more colour into my life? More nourishing and less depleting activities.
Balance
Where am I on my personal scale? What can I do to help balance myself?
Pace & Plan
Play - Achieve - Care - Energise - Prepare - List - Action - Notice
Listen
I have 2 years and only one mouth! How can I show that I'm really listening?
Respect
The more I give - the more I get. Respect myself & others - Treat others as I want to be treated
Reflect
What can I learn about what happened? What went well? What didn't go so well? What can I do differently next time?
Crystal Clear
Concise - Lucid & Logical - Emotion-free expression - Assertive - Realistic.
Ask or Say No
How can I ask someone what I really want to ask for? It's OK to say no - I can say it in a way that is OK for me as well as the other person.
Maintain Relationship
Say in touch with friends, family and important others. When you're feeling low, let someone know.
Talk The Talk
Communicate assertively. Smile - warm & friendly - relaxed - comfortable eye contact.
